What He has for us….

It’s Friday night. That’s family movie night in the Atkinson house. And it’s Collin’s week. You know what that means…. Star Wars. Tonight, I was snuggled up on the big couch between Collin and Alexa, all covered in blankets. We were the coziest. Suddenly Alexa said, “Mom, nothing could ever break up you and dad.” I said, “Nope sweet girl. NOTHING could ever break up me and dad. We are a team.” She looked at me with the most contented look ever and said, “You are a team. Our whole family is a team.”

Ryan and I met at blockbuster video 21 years ago this month. Remember blockbuster video?! He worked at the one right next to my house. When I met him I was very intentionally NOT dating. But immediately I could tell he was worth the trouble. The very first conversation I ever had with him was about Christ, and our mutual love for Him. And so began our team.

Wow. What a journey it has been. Having Caleb was a game-changer. We were warned immediately about the impact that a special needs child has on a marriage. And the divorce rate. But we were not shaken. In the Lord’s strength we have only grown stronger and stronger and then stronger still.

Then came Silas. Another ally. He has always been for us. From an early age he valued our family. He was proud to be an Atkinson. He has always trusted us and understood what we have tried to teach him.

Finally, our final additions. Cheyenne, Collin and Alexa. Three more allies. It’s almost beyond belief. Of course, they weren’t immediately sold on the Atkinson team. They had to learn us first. They had to see what we are all about. They had to see if our words matched our actions. But in time, they learned to trust us.

Ryan and I. Our marriage. It has provided security for our children. Dr. Glover told us it would. But it felt like sort of a coincidence with our first two. It became very evident with our final three. They even talked about it out loud. And so we became Team Atkinson. Family of 7.

Last summer Vanderbilt called to tell me our Orthopedist of the last 11 years was retiring. Nooooooooo!!!! They wanted to transfer us to a different doctor, Dr. Martus. The first available appointment with him would be Wednesday, May 5, 2021. Whatever. It was 9 months away. That would never come.

Well, last week I had to come to grips with the fact that it was here. I had to make the arrangements. It’s a 3 hour drive to Nashville, the appointment, then a 3 hour drive home. Ugh. The dread came over me. I arranged for our sweet neighbors to pick the kids up from school and keep them until Ryan got home from work. I asked my mom to go with us just to make it a little more fun. But the dread had settled hard. Right to my bones.

On Tuesday, the day before the Vandy appointment, I got a call from Caleb’s school. He had hurt his knee at school playing four square. When I arrived at the school Caleb was a mess. He was crying hard. All the people were trying to comfort him- the nurse, the teacher’s assistant, the principal, the office staff. Nope. Inconsolable. And he couldn’t put any weight on his left leg at all. The nurse and I literally lifted him into the car. When I got home, I had to carry him inside. Then carry him to the toilet. Then carry him back to the car to get his siblings at school. It must have been adrenaline because he definitely weighs more than me.

Just as I was starting to feel defeated. Overwhelmed. Sad. Tired….. the pieces of God’s provision became clear. And they started coming together. And I was seeing the beautiful picture. Even in the midst of the hard. I was seeing that this is what God has for us.

That appointment. We had that appointment at Vandy the next day. We needed it desperately. And if we hadn’t already had it, it would have been impossible to get.

My sweet husband. He came home from work and saw the need. With no hesitation he cancelled an important meeting so that he could chauffeur us the next day. And do the heavy lifting.

My mom and neighbors worked together to figure out caring for our other children. Because they wanted to. Because they love all of us.

Ryan, Caleb and I went to Vandy. We met Dr. Martus. What a kind and gentle man. He was so patient. It was our first visit with him and yet he felt so familiar. And I think he cares for us. Genuinely cares. Sadly, Caleb’s knee is fractured. He is casted from thigh to toes on his left leg. As Tony (the sweetest cast guy ever) was applying Caleb’s Duke blue and yellow cast, Caleb was crying so hard. I’m sure he sees that a lot but he was heartbroken for Caleb. He cared that Caleb won’t be able to swim. So thankful for God’s provision of people that care.

The next day, Marmee picked up Silas, Cheyenne, Collin and Alexa from school. They had not seen Caleb for 36 hours. I wish all of you could have been a fly on the wall. The love and devotion that these Fabulous 5 have for one another is beyond words. We literally had to set a timer for taking turns pushing Caleb in his wheelchair. They all had special activities planned that they wanted to do with him. They all said they wouldn’t swim until he got his cast off (we are trying to talk them out of that by the way). They made him cards. They served him meals. They played blocks with him. They read him books. I can’t explain the way it all made me feel. Could they really be this devoted to Caleb? Is this for real? And then something hit me. Caleb has been devoted to each of them. Not just sometimes. Always. In God’s provision, our sweet children are really this devoted to one another. The Atkinson team knows devotion.

Today Caleb went to school for a short day. Because he missed his FMS people and they missed him. We were greeted in front of the school by Lil. Another one of God’s provisions. She has been his Physical Therapist for many years. She is adorable and has more energy than a teenager (FYI- she sounds like a teenager when you talk to her on the phone. Crazy!). She has taught me so much about Caleb over the years. I remember when he was in the 2nd grade and she was doing treadmill therapy with him. She was so excited when she got him up to 1 mph on that treadmill! I had been frustrated about how slow he walked…. she taught me that my bar was too high at that moment. She also bought this huge tricycle for him to ride around Farragut Primary School. And she would have him deliver things around the building riding it! She is just the best. Today was no different. She made sure he was as comfortable as could be. She made sure I was as comfortable as could be. She made sure everybody knew what was what. And she was happy to do all of it. Everybody was. The teachers, assistants, principals, therapists…. they all were so happy to have Caleb back.

I am so tired. Ryan is so tired. Bone tired. But our hearts are so full. How could they not be? We are surrounded by the Lord’s provisions. And we have faith. We have faith that He will provide for whatever else He has for us.